It's my favorite time of year. The time of year I wait for all year long. I get nervous through the fall that winter is coming, I get angry and sad all winter waiting for the snow to go away, and then spring comes and things start to look up again. Now it's finally here and I am happy as can be! Unfortunately though, I feel as if I've fallen off the wagon a bit. Now don't get me wrong, I havn't gained anything back! I am still down the 25 lbs and super happy about that! The thing is, I was sick for about a week, and then I started a new job, and being on a totally messed up schedule I feel as if I've lost an entire week that could've been put to good use! I am also unfortunately dealing with some demons...food. damn you food :( lol. I am feeling like I want everythingggg. Like i'm missing out and i'm deprived. I know, I should just treat myself to a little something and move on...but I want a little of like 15 different things. I just have to push through it and keep telling myself it'll still be there when I lose weight, and it'll still taste as it did in the past. I lay at the beach today lovingggg the weather, the sun, the beautiful water, and thinking of how I want to look when I lay on the beach next summer. I want to be down 100 lbs by next summer. there is NOOO way I can do that if I give in to my urges. I need to keep focused, keep writing, keep thinking how happy I'll be when I reach my goals instead of the minute of pleasure from something that tastes good. I need to focus on my new job, and get on a good schedule and get my ass to the gym as much as I possibly can. I have big goals, but I am determined and I know I can do what I set my mind to...just need to not sabotage myself!! Maybe i'll go back to the beach tuesday to remind myself how much I love laying out in a bathing suit and want to change how I look!